Msn Talk

There's always something either profoundly funny or intelligent or genuinely interesting, or total crap being said in conversations over MSN everywhere. I am, in a nod to something I saw on some fit girls website going to start quoting more from certain MSN conversations. The first, speaks for itself.

what does a whore need buttons for? Says:
vaginas are cool

Flowers are the new black

Red Ball Blue Ball

I had a 'bit of fun' today in the garden and tried chucking balls into the air and then taking a picture of it before it landed, these alas were the best of a lame bunch.

The Beautiful Sky

Tiredness And Random The Shining References

When you finish a journey in your car and try to put your cd player frontage in your sunglasses case and your sunglasses in your cd player frontage holder you know your so "Here's Johhhnnnnyyyy" tired that your going to go insane. But relax, because you have finished your journey...You can now hopefully sleep, if you have just arrived at a party of some sorts though your totally "Redrum" screwed.

Whatever Next?

Has anybody ever used Next.co.uk to shop online? because I've got some clothes I ordered the other day and they haven't charged me for them yet, in fact I haven't been able to make a payment online at all. Is there some kind of high-tech-fangled way of doing it? Or do you just have to wait a few days before it can be processed? Your comments as always are apprectiated apart form the moo and boobies.

Adrenoleukodystrophy

It's a big long motherfucker of a word yo. It's what the doctors or quackiequacks as I don't refer to them as think I have, and is the original cause of me having Addison's Disease, although they have taken another blood test today just to be 100% sure they are pretty certain that is what it is. Basically in stupid-drunk-Irishman's terms my body is missing an enzyme and has been since birth. When they can confirm this is what I have [3-4 months] they will then test to see whether I have inherited the condition or whether I have spawned this genetic balls up myself and by myself I mean my parents obviously. I like to share all this with the world just cause I will probably forget otherwise and this way I have something to refer back to [insert canned laughter]. Adrenoleukodystrophy [deep breath now], as well as affecting the adrenal glands can also affect the nervous system of the body causing potentially not very nice things [lets not go there] but there is every chance this won't happen to me for a very long time [yay]. The complicated bit: If I have a son he won't get it and will be totally okay, if I ever have a daughter she will be totally okay too [women can't suffer from this condition] but she would be a carrier meaning there is a potential 50% chance of my grandchildren inheriting the condition. Anyway, enough about me...How are you?

So I yawned so loud earlier I totally sounded like Chubacker.

Hilarious things come to those who wait

It's totally irrelent now, but I just thought of a great ironic [we Brits just love irony don't you know] joke about legendary former wrestler and poor actor extrodinaire The Rock. So, the joke:

Wouldn't it be great if The Rock had his own cooking show on cable TV, you could call it "Can you smell what the rock is cooking?" and if that "hilarious" joke wasn't enough for you how about this, Ruomlig bumped into the legendary Dan Hawkins [Of The Darkness fame] the other day in Waitrose Wymondham. It took me like 2 days to come up with a "joke" for this bizzare scenario but here it is, Ruomlig should have shouted at him "Get your hands off my trolley, MOTHERFUCKERRRRRRR" Anyway, that's it. Boo frickin' hoo.

Sin City

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0401792
Release Date: June 2005 (UK)
Running Time: 124 minutes

I'm not a fan of film noir, and to be honest I didn't have a clue what Sin City was before venturing out to the cinema. But maybe that is one of the reasons Sin City is one of my favorite films of 2005 because I had no pre-conceptions of what to expect, no hopes to dash and no expectations to meet. So yeah, it's good. Most notably the performances of Bruce "Yipee K Ay Mother Fucker" Willis as Hartigan, Mickey "Spun" Rourke as Marv, Elijah "hobbit" Wood as the scary as fuck Kevin and Clive "Closer" Owen as Dwight. It's superbly well directed, bringing the comic to life literally (even though I have never actually seen the comic myself but I have heard other people comment :P) using the same kind of technique they used on Sky Captain And The World Of Tomorrow (shooting everything against a blue screen) If you thought Kill Bill Vol's 1/2 was gory and or explicit you have seen nothing, this is an 18 rated film in every conceivable way. It's heavily stylized and you will either love the dialogue or hate it but there's plenty here for everyone to enjoy, even a brief moment of humor amid the chaotic violence.

Bon's My favorite Films of All Time

If someone were to ask me what my favorite film was, I would tell them to ask me something more interesting. But...If I was absolutely forced to give an answer, however, I would be inclined to say Fight Club, the performances of Brad Pitt and Ed Norton speak for themselves, the direction is subtle genius and the conclusion utterly shocking in a "Bruce Willis has been dead all along" Sixth Sense kind of way Speaking of which, here are the best of the rest:

* Pulp Fiction
* Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
* The Silence Of The Lambs
* Se7en
* Garden State
* Gangs of New York
* Unbreakable
* The Lion King
* The Matrix

Some more of my favorite films which don?t quite make it into my all-time favorites:

* Die Hard 1,2,3
* Black Hawk Down
* Resevoir dogs
* The Royal Tenenbaum's
* Toy Story
* Saving Private Ryan
* Forrest Gump
* Apocalypse Now Redux
* The Lord Of The Rings 1,2,3


Thank you. This is not a meme(ish)

I also love Dumb and Dumber like it's the best film of all time, but I know I shouldn't so it doesn't officially make any grade in this list apart from this special mention. BTW, the films stated here may not actually be my favorites at all, in fact my opinions and choices are likely to change on a regular basis but I thought I owed it to myself to at least try.

If You write it, they will come

I have implemented comments onto my Blog now, I'm sure you have noticed. But alas nobody has put pen to paper [or finger to key] yet, If by some random chance you come across my site and I don't know you please, make the effort to post a comment. Let us dance the dance of the kings and be as one, a force for all that is Blogger. Also, everyone that does know me feel free to not write stupid comments on my post such as "boobies" were not 18 anymore!

Word=Love

Love is free, love is bleeding
Love can hurt, stop me healing
You can tell if you are dying
Stop yourself from even trying
You go work and tie your laces intertwining messy words
I'd like to see you, If only to talk and argue
Purple rain clouds in the sky, soaring by
Teardrops fall on the streets outside, like the rain it's just life
Fading noises, making choices doing everything wrong
It's all in reverse in this verse you curse falling in in front of us

You are pretty, it's such a pity your so messed up
I wish I could see you, maybe be with you till the clock says we have to stop
You are mine even though your not
Feelings mixing, must be the drink and drugs
Flashes of light, my eyes are filled with spite
The weight of envy, a crashing frenzy I wanted to say I felt so lost
Could you take a piece of advice? It's all lies
Could you stop this ticking bomb, it's going to kill everyone
I try to save you, but I have to get in line, the battles lost before it's won.

Fever Of Hay

I thought (read: hoped) that this year my hayfever would be a lesser evil than it has been in previous years due to the fact I am now on medication [hyrdrocortisone and fludrocortisone 3 times daily] for my "chronic" illness Addison's. But no, my nose still runs and bleeds and my eyes still get bloodshot. It's uncomfortable and unnecessary and it makes me look like I'm best friends with Pete Doherty (mmm drugs etc.) anyway roll on the autumn months when hayfever disappears from whence it came. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the sunny weather as much as Johnny 'I love the sun' Sunny [I made him up :P] but I don't enjoy the condition it brings with it. Also I hate wasps and bumblebees, they are evillllll.

Again with the Wordlove

Hum drum, take another life with a gun
Faithless as you turn your back and run
The wind chimes, moving things and changing over time
You don't know what you do, beaten black and blue
Sonic mutation of things overview
Of things over you.

More Wordlove

You called to say hello
You called to say you know
You called and wanted to talk
And I hung up the phone
Eternally you were mine
Tried to ignore the advice
Tried to ignore the signs
These are dangerous times
Hey, what are you doing to me?
I feel dizzy and weak and I still can't speak
It's been three weeks
And my heart keeps beating twice as fast
As if to say, you have found love, don't give it away
Drink another bottle, soon began to choke
Too wasted to talk, too selfish and dull
Sad feelings evoked
I called her days ago
She didn't answer the phone
She didn't say hello, just a message then the tone
I could write another poem, threaten i'll leave home
Bleed till I feel no pain, cry till I feel no shame
Keep on ringing but nobody cares
Keep on starring but there's nothing there
Keep on crying, forever tears
It's totally unstoppable fear
It's totally unstoppable fear
It's totally unstoppable fear
It's totally unstoppable fear.

Deep Space Beaver: The Mini Series

Fohn Doe 11: My god, has anyone seen Fohn Doe's 1-10?

Bon Doe 12: No, and has anybody seen Bon Doe's 1-11?

Ed: Missed much you have

Moe: Yeah, there were lightsabres and there was petrol everywhere!

John Doe 762 Pulls A LightSabre Out Of His Cloak...

Captain: No, everybody down! John Doe has the upper hand!

-I really, don't know. I'm that tired.

:/

I like to think I'm left of the middle, the other side of normal and/or non-generic. I wear pink shirts and write poetry, but I'm still a man and not in the slightest bit interested in homo-eroticisim. Anyway I thought I should clear that up before I proceed to publish another barrage of wordlove.

If I could touch you now
If I could hold you now
Shiver down my spine
Sparks fly out
Blinding light so confused
I feel betrayed and used.

Sarah, Suzi, Sophie Sarah.

Life's Mysteries

The numbers you calculate sit on a desk and wait for you to operate
But you see, when you believe you have to conceive there's nothing so wrong it can't be put right
And that's when you try, oh you try till you can find some peace of mind
You roll life's mysteries up into one
The moon and the sun
Now can you see
Just you and me
In the parking lot of an empty shopping mall someone sits in a car and stalls
They grab the wheel and rip it off, their anger fueled by years of loss
A little tear drops, on the face of a soldier he's only 21 but feels years older
You roll life's mysteries up into one
A shot from a gun
Now we can try
Just you and I
Yeah you roll life's mysteries up into one
We had a son, a new life begun
If only we tried, so hard not to cry
Maybe we could, do some good
The deep ocean may hold the key
So empty and blue
Just me and you.

Words Come Easy: A Random Collection Of Poetry By Me

You’re a ghost to me, nothing but a memory
Close your eyes and you’ll know what I mean
Count to ten when you start to scream
R.E.M then you start to dream.

You don’t need eyes to see
You don’t need lungs to breathe
You don’t need common sense to know
You’re a part of this disease, so raise your hands skyward and face the East.

The blood pours out of me from all this surgery
I used to feel so alive now life is so contrived
I smile on the outside secretly hoping I don’t survive
Noise and vision fading, my brains doing overtime
Emptiness can be so divine.

No lines from which to trace and everyone’s being erased then all of our systems failing, good dies and evils prevailing there’s no time in which to change it, all life is slowly fading.

You broke another mirror, another seven years of bad luck
You keep getting thinner
You need to make up your mind
When you’re looking for something
You’re not going to find.

You fly me to the moon, and show me the view
The stars burn bright, turning day into night.

How much heat can you stand before you burry your head in the sand
An opportunity not fate or destiny
Before I leave you and go just a few words you should know
Every word was a lie. Think about that as I die. Break down and cry.

The first line comes easy
You tear down the walls just to see me
Will I see you soon?
You eat my heart out with a spoon
Message on your machine, doesn’t play to me
All I ever wanted was company.

I don't know where inspiration comes from, but sometimes you have to go out and find it. I mean this totally un-literally of course, the day you can get 10 liters of inspiration from a Life Petrol Station™ is the day I will feel totally and completely obsolete.

You Crash I Burn: A Poem By Justin Shough

There's been another accident, your pictures on the news
A simple chain of events become so confused
The wreckage comes into view, your body black and blue
I haven'’t seen you, since they cut you loose
An angel in the corridor, escaping through the vents inside the roof
Eternal light, forever bright, fading into gloom
There'’s something I've been thinking about, I'd like to say it was you
Kaleidoscopic nightmares hide the awful truth.